Late Nights

             Sometimes I just sit and think, and think is the optimal term because it's not really a specific train of thought but more of a wreck of past, present and future experiences all smashing together. I can lay in my bed night after night just waiting on something to break, because fixing something that's broken would be easy in comparison to keeping the 5 million things I'm juggling up in the air constantly. I have hopes and dreams that I can't even properly define. I feel like I'll know it when I get there. The crazy part about my life is I spend all this time sitting and thinking, trying to piece together a map of how to achieve my aspirations and it's not possible. Infact it's insanity, I do it night after night expecting a new result to an unsolvable puzzle. I've figured out that the thinking hasn't given me a map or a plan, thinking has taught me that no matter how much I feel like I know, absolutely NOTHING can be planned out to perfection. That no matter how many nights I lay and think about what's next I won't know until I actually get there. There's a certain beauty in the unknown, and it's always right around the corner. No maps needed.